apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
