I'm really into asian looking animals
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
