Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
he thought i was a dude.
the day after is always just damage control
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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