Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
