Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
