hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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