At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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