Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
