dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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