Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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