I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
