She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize