FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
