He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
