i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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