Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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