Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
