I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
