okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
