I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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