I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
