So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
