Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
