Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
