I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
