Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
