Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Everclear isn't food dammit
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
