I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize