chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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