Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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