There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
