Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
