so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I can't put those talents on a resume
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
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