Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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