tell your sister to shave her snatch
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
