not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
