Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
