I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
