...so i touched it.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
