i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
