so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
