I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Randomize