Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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