Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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