when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
