Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Never joke about your clitoris.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
