It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I just want nice things and good sex
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
