You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
