I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
