3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
