Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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